A man called Derbyshire police to claim he was 'abused' by a nurse and demanded that officers attend instantly.
But when police arrived they found out the man was annoyed - because he felt the nurse wasn't thorough enough with his sexual health screening.
The incredulous incident was revealed by Derbyshire Constabulary's Control Centre on Twitter in a bid to highlight how police time is wasted.
Referring to the bizarre call this week, the control centre tweeted: "We have no words."
Meanwhile, a man called the contact centre on Friday and said he was 'robbed'.
What actually happened was that a police officer had confiscated alcohol from him which he had been drinking in public.
The control centre tweeted: "He was suitably advised - and wasn't given his alcohol back, much to his disappointment."